A Guide in Surviving TEP

Well, the holidays are about to end, and it’s going back to school in about a week for most of you. Some of you are probably happy after rotting at home to finally return and see your friends, while others who do not mind rotting at homeand hate the fact that they’re going back to school. Whatever the case, school is still around the corner.

BUT it’s a new environment now, one that doesn’t involve lecture notes, tutorials or ICAs. It’s a real working situation where you get a little taste of the media industry and how it operates.

Yep, no more of this too.

Now I can see you panicking, pull up your pants and just follow these few steps to get your game on track.

Step 1: Final Cut Pro (FCP)

This is the editing software that most of you would be tinkering with once you enter the Media Hub; some of you rather not edit and dump it on teammates during production ICAs.

It has a free camera too!

I cannot stress enough that this is a very, VERY important life skill once you enter the Media Hub, there’s no way you can buy yourself out of messing around with FCP (unless you’re experienced with the loan sharks). Even so, you’ll be doing nothing if you do not wish to edit on FCP for most of the days in TEP, and that would really bring life to the phrase: “dying of boredom”.

Step 2: Come Early

This isn’t Year 1 or 2, where you can waltz in tutorial rooms or lecture halls, or even decide which days to skip and go. Those were the days, but they’re currently storedin the attic with your cutting classes during secondary school and primary school fake sick bay excuses.

Fortunately, the media believes in the grace period (10 minutes), so take that to your advantage by applying it to situations on whether to lie in bed for another good 5 minutes before going to the shower.

That is, if your alarm clock doesn’t screw you over

.

However, the grace period is a double edged sword, whereby if you happen to arrive in at 9:11a.m, they will take 11 minutes on what you owe to TEP instead of 1 minute.

So my advice (the irony of it coming from me) would be getting the hell on time, it’s a good habit to practice when you enter the real working world and desperately wish you have a car so you can avoid the freaking train during peak hours.

Step 3: Don’t Facebook

Nuff said.

Step 4: Breaks

The way how breaks work in TEP is that someone HAS to be in the room at all times. So not everyone can go strolling out once its 12 o’clock, oh no, someone has to stay behind.

At 12 o’clock, angry, sugar-derived, hungry, starving people will do anything to NOT be the person staying behind. So backstabs, betrayals and sneaking out will be common during these hours.

Your imagination tends to go wild when you’re hungry

For obvious purposes, I won’t divulge my trade secrets in sneaking out for lunch breaks, but what I can tell you, is to take exactly an hour for your lunch breaks, because while you’re eating, your fellow classmates are probably considering cannibalization, and you wouldn’t want to walk into a room of hungry cannibals when your belly is full to the brim, now, would you?

So, that’s basically the few basic steps in TEP that are pretty much needed for your ensured survival in the Media Hub.

Results may vary

Jetpacks Naow.

Going back to school has reminded me one thing; it reminds me on the pace people walk to school as if they’re on a minefield.

In other words, they walk TOO DAMN

SLOW.

If you could strap everyone with a turtle shell and paint them green, I swear it would look as if turtles came ashore for some mating season. It’s bad enough they walk as if they’re stuck in bullet time mode from the Matrix, but they find the annoying need to block people behind too.

What your mind visualizes during the frustration period.

Every time I arrive on the station, I have exactly 10 minutes to make it to school or else I can kiss my attendance goodbye, so you can see why I can’t join the others in Wonderland to find the Tin Man, and the fact that the security guard prevents me from going through the carpark is plain dumb, since I can save at least 5 minutes instead walking the long, “scenic” route.

Fortunately, I’ve learnt a few tricks to lessen the agony if you happen to find yourself stuck in said situation.

Yea, I wish too.

Firstly, tailgating:

As the name implies, find another person who seems to be in a rush. Usually this person would not notice he/she is being stalked and will attempt to clear a path through the horde. What you simply need to do, is to follow behind closely, so you’ll get a personal path-clearer free of charge. Results may vary of course, depending on how late the poor bastard is.

Trololololololo~

Secondly, phone talking:

Pretend to be on the phone, and begin speaking loudly and laughing. This works best against a group of friends walking in a straight obstructing line on the narrow path, since your laughs and loud words block their boring conversations, thus, they will make way for you without even needing to ask, since they would love nothing better but to return to their conversation on how he made the most funniest “Knock Knock” joke.

Just don’t overdo it.

Lastly, walk with friends:

The phrase “fight fire with fire” applies here. Arrange yourself and your friends in a way where you are walking down in a line which dominates the path. Walk at your desired pace, and be rowdy as you can. What this would do is to clear the path in front of you as startled people in front would move out of the way, and at the same time, you get to play bully by blocking people behind your path.

Nuff said.

I guess, however, nothing changes the fact that the horde is still there, ever present to hinder your dash for punctuality. It’s easy to say “wake up earlier, and get the hell out of your house earlier”, but to do it is another story.

BZZZZZZZZT

And that's why I don't answer my phone.

No, kidding, maybe only 25% of the time?

Yeah, this isn't helping...